Are You His Date Or His Designated Ugly Friend (DUF)? 15 Signs You'll Never Be His It Girl

Sometimes you're not sure where you stand with that friend of yours. Sometimes it's hard to tell if he thinks of you more than a friend and other times you know for sure that you are indeed just his friend. It's definitely hard to draw the line when you feel like his actions show that there could be something more between you guys. Is he flirting or is he just teasing? It's understandable why you want to avoid having the talk; you're either afraid to know the truth or you don't want to put him in an awkward place and make the friendship weird in case he doesn't think anything more of you. In order to prevent all this from happening, you focus more on his actions and you try to make some sense out of why he does the things he does and why he says the things he says. His vague actions make you wonder, “Am I on a date or am I just his designated ugly friend?” How extremely frustrating…

Actions speak louder than words, but sometimes there really aren't any deep meanings behind the actions. You can look at it however you want, but your views are likely to be subjective, depending on how you feel about him. The surest way for you to know how he feels about you is to have the talk with him, but if it's only for the sake of you being curious, then take a look at the list below. A friendship can turn into a relationship and he will treat you more like a girl than a friend, so if he does any of these 15 things, he does not see you as his girlfriend and you will never be his it girl, unfortunately.

15 He Includes Other People To Movies, To Eat, And Everywhere Else Because He Doesn't Want To Be Seen With You In Public 1 On 1

So you made plans with him to go to the movies. He does not only make you get there by yourself but also invited a whole lot of other people to join you guys. Does he always invite other people whenever you guys make plans and you expect it to be just the two of you? Maybe he likes to be in a group or maybe he's too embarrassed to be seen with you alone. Just because he is down to go to the movies, eat at a restaurant, go bowling, and other events with you doesn't necessarily mean he likes you likes you, especially if he's inviting other people like all the time. It's best you don't think he's trying to cover up a date by adding more people. This is not a date on the DL. He doesn't want to be seen with you in public 1 on 1!

14 He Asks You To Bring Along Your Hot Friends

He's throwing a party or going on a vacation and he invites you but he also tells you to bring your friends. You may think he wants to make sure you come as long as your girlfriends are with you so you won't feel all alone. That seems legit, but are your girlfriends hot? It could be like from the movie, The DUFF, where all of her girlfriends are super hot and guys ask her for their numbers or they try to even ask her to hook them up with one of them. Think about the times you brought your girlfriends to these events. He was probably happy, but not mainly for the reason that you made it, but because you really did bring your girlfriends. He's probably into one of them and he's trying to get with her. Maybe you feel like he wants to get with you so he's trying leave a good impression with your friends. If he's not paying any attention to you and all of it's on her, then that's a big sign that he's really interested in her and not in you.

13 He Only Texts You Here And There But Never Calls

Whenever you guys talk, it's never through phone calls. He always texts you or messages you through social media. A guy who is interested in you would call you just to hear your voice even though he has nothing to talk about. He probably would just want to see how you're doing and stay on the line as long as he can. He most certainly would not text you and then leave you hanging when he's got something else to do. Where's the romance in that? Also, if his texts are mostly about his problems like about his bad day or some girl he's interested in, then he's only talking to you because he wants a listener and that is it. You're someone he can ramble with about anything at anytime. Your opinions of him don't matter, because he doesn't see a romantic relationship with you, like ever.

12 He Wants To Go Dutch Every Time You Guys Go Out

Friends sometimes pay for each other as a nice gesture, for a birthday or a celebratory event. If you guys always go dutch then he's really implying that you and him are just friends. If he never pays for you, then it's pretty much self-explanatory. You will never be that girlfriend he will occasionally spoil. He doesn't feel the need to leave an impression that he's a gentleman with you. It doesn't necessarily mean that he's the stingy type. He doesn't want to show any implication that might show that he may be interested, because he is not. There's a boundary between you and him and he will never cross it. This is one of the more clearer signs a guy can give if he's not interested in that way.

11 He Teases You But Not In A Flirtatious Way

It's definitely a friend thing to tease one another and not in a flirtatious way. He makes fun of you, telling you that you look like sh*t because you haven't slept in days, like your hair is messy, your clothes are all wrinkled, and your dark circles make you look like a panda. Even if he compliments you, it's not really a compliment if he throws in a snide comment, “Wow, that's a nice dress… just not on you.” Even if his intention was to just tease, you might take it as flirting, because sometimes it's hard to define what is what. Maybe it's like in the movie, He's Just Not That Into You: if a guy treats you like a jerk then he likes you. Nope. If a guy likes you, he will never make remarks that have the possibility of upsetting you. He will avoid coming off like a jerk, because he knows that's a big turn off.

10 He Talks About His Exes Or Any Girl He Finds Attractive With You

You might think he's trying to see your reaction by talking about his ex or any girl he finds attractive just to stir the pot, but that's not true. Maybe in some cases, but that can look quite unattractive on his part. Would you want to talk about your ex or any guy you're attractive to with someone you want to get with? Honestly, what good would that do? The only thing you can get from this is that he is not interested in you and he is implying that you should not overthink this. If he keeps talking about his ex, it means that he has not gotten over her, and is possibly not ready to be in a relationship with someone else. If he's talking about this girl he's into, then he's clearly telling you that that girl is not you. There's only so much you can take from this. A guy would never ever talk about his ex with someone he's trying to form a new relationship with, but as a friend, he definitely won't mind doing it.

9 He Does Not Invite You To His Place Ever

So he never invites you to his place, uh-oh. That is like his sacred place; it's a place where his things are, a place where he spends his time doing whatever it is that he does there, and basically his life is there. If he never invited you to his place like ever, then yeah, it's not because his place is dirty or he doesn't like having people over, it's just you. He doesn't feel like you need to be in his personal space, because he doesn't see the purpose. There's no need for you to see how he lives. There's no place for you at his place or in his heart. There's just no place for you at all. If you were someone he was interested in then he would want to share his lifestyle with you. He would want to show you what it would be like to be with him. He doesn't feel the need to share this with someone who is nothing more than a friend.

8 He Does Not Initiate Plans, You Usually Do

You guys hang out a lot only because you initiate the plans and not him. It's always been you who wanted to get drinks, go hiking, and other activities. He goes along with it, because either he's a great friend or he's just bored. Had he ever ask you to go do something with just him? No? Then yeah, you're never on his mind. You only pop up on his mind when you ask him to hang out. Otherwise, he's probably doing something else and too busy to think about you at all. Even if he doesn't initiate plans, he probably knows that you will. You may be too available for him that he doesn't care to keep in touch with you. If he truly likes you then he will make the effort to make plans with you and since he's made no efforts, it's likely that you're that friend who's just there.

7 He Uses You As His Wing Woman

He asks you to join him and his friends when they go out to a bar or to a party. You're extremely flattered by this, because you're literally the only girl he asked. You think he wants to be with you during the night too. Yeah, that may be true. He thinks you're a fun and a sociable person to have at social gatherings, but every time you go out with him, why is it that he always ends up with another girl? To make you jealous? No. It's likely that he asked you to come out so that he can use you to get himself some girls. You're basically his Wing Woman! It's hard to get attractive girls when he is with an even more attractive girl, because it makes them self-conscious and it makes them wonder why he's not getting it on with her instead. With you, girls might think it's sweet that he doesn't care about looks and it's a score for him! If this was a date, it would have been you he ended up with and not someone else.

6 He Treats You Like "One Of His Bros"

He calls you “Yo” or “Dude” when he greets you or to get your attention, just like he does with all his guy friends. Maybe you think it's because he's really comfortable with you. Yes, he definitely is comfortable with you. He totally friend zoned you. Any guy who has even the smallest crush on someone would never say that because it's misleading. Also, do you watch sports game and have chicken wings with beer? Do you play video games with him whenever you guys hang out? If so, then yeah, you're really nothing more than a friend to him. He's not doing anything to impress you, like nothing at all. If this were a date, he would have avoided food like chicken wings because they get really messy and he would've thought of another place to spend time with you because games get people riled up and yelling. This is not what a guy would want to show the girl he is trying to win over.

5 He Tries To Set You Up With Someone Else

He's always trying to set you up with someone or one of his friends. You might think this is him trying to figure out if you're interested in someone other than him, but he's not. If he likes you, he will never want to share and he won't even joke about setting you up on a date. He's a friend trying to get you to date and he wants it to work out. It still makes you wonder, doesn't it? What is really his purpose of hooking you up with someone else? Maybe he wants to make sure that you know he's the only one for you after many failed dates. Well, maybe he truly believes that you're more compatible with that person. He wants what's best for you as a friend and he's sure that that someone is not himself.

4 He Is Way Too Comfortable Around You Like Farting, Burping, Picking His Nose…

Farting, burping, and picking the nose… that's really extreme. He is way too comfortable with you that he's okay with letting everything out. You basically see the side of him only his guy friends see. He doesn't care if it smells or what it looks like when he's doing all these things. One thing for sure is that he would never ever do these with a girl he likes, so you're just another “bro” to him. Of course it's natural to do these, but if he has no shame and even purposely does it just because he can then that's pretty obvious, isn't it? He doesn't care what you think, because he knows for sure that you are just another one of his bros. People tend to be more careful in front of someone they want to know on a romantic level.

3 He Is More Focused On Social Media And His Phone When He's With You

His focus is always on his phone when he's with you. He's constantly checking his social media and he's not paying any attention to you at all. He's like in his own little world and it doesn't even feel like he's really there. A guy who finds his phone more entertaining or rather more important than you says something, doesn't it? He doesn't care that you're there. It's as if he's waiting for the time to hurriedly pass so that he can move on to better things. If a guy is interested in you, his eyes will be only be on you, his body will be facing you, and he will be very attentive. Friends don't really do this to friends, and if he does this, then you might have to rethink your friendship with him. This certainly is not a date if he's been on his phone the whole time you guys were together.

2 He Wants Advice From You To Impress Other Ladies

Your advice only matters to him when he has questions about impressing other ladies. Yup. That's it. He doesn't ask you much about anything else, but when he's attracted to someone, he comes running to you. He wants you to help him pick out his new wardrobe at the mall, he wants you to help him find a nice restaurant to take her, and practically everything. This might leave you confused if you ever felt like there was some connection between you and him. You might think he's taking you to places, because he wants to see what you like and remember it when he's ready to make a move. No, no, he just wants to know what girls would like so he's just doing a trial run. Don't mistake this as a date!

1 He Says You're A Great Friend And What You Guys Have Is Platonic Love

Okay, there is no clearer sign than this. You might think this is a mind game but it's not. This is him telling you straightforward that he only considers you as a great friend and that nothing, nothing will change this. He will never be your boyfriend and you will never be his girlfriend. You don't have to wonder or be confused anymore. Even if there are some mixed signals, you wouldn't have to overthink it and you wouldn't have to try to figure out the meaning behind his words and actions, because he made it crystal clear. He is either being friendly, caring, or nothing. What's definite is that he told you where you stand in his life. Be the best friend he'll ever have, because you'll never be anything more.