8 Signs Your Ex Has Moved On Before You And 8 Signs They Are Still Secretly Obsessed

There is no point in even trying to sugar coat this: breakups are a terribly heart-wrenching and unpleasant experience. On top of that, there is an entire grieving phase that you have to go through after the fact. For some of us, it is tempting to Facebook stalk our ex just to know what they are doing and how they are coping in life without us in the picture. For the rest of us, we just wanted to get out of the relationship anyways and the break up was somewhat of relief. Whether they broke our hearts or if we broke theirs, breakups are just a pain but a part of life nonetheless.

However, it is human nature to at least be curious to know how the good old ex of ours feels in the wake of a breakup. Emotions will be running high and everyone will be adjusting to single life in various ways (albeit some are more healthy than others). This list describes in full detail the healthy ways that your ex has moved on and the not so healthy ways that they still might be secretly obsessed. Be aware that these facts can also apply to you and your self-reflection on how you are coping after a break up.

16 Moved On: Their Social Media Activity Stays The Same As Before

If he handled the breakup in a mature manner and is clearly moving on with his life, then you won't see any change in his social media activity. His posts will be the same as before and he won't even allude to "his evil ex" in any of his posts. An immature dude will post excessively and probably passive aggressively about you and will post content as a way to get a reaction out of you (more to come describing that in the next post). Instead, a clear indicator that he as moved on is if he just goes on in the land of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. without having even acknowledging your very existence. This might be a blow to your ego because you were expecting otherwise.

15 Secretly Obsessed: They Post An Excessive Amount Of Party Pictures And Pics With Other Hot Girls

So immediately following a breakup (especially if you were the one who ended it), a guy's immediate reaction will be to party and go out as much as humanely possible. Not only that, but he must capture the events and blow up Facebook, Twitter or Instagram with photographic evidence that he has "moved on" or is "over you" even though his actions clearly state otherwise. This is especially true if he makes it a point to post pictures with other girls who are attractive just to keep you wondering if he is going to date any of them. This is a clear indicator that he is still secretly obsessed with you and going out of his way in order to make you jealous. He could also be having a routine boy's night out every weekend so that you know that he is on the prowl for the next girl to take home.

14 Moved On: They Take Their Sweet, Precious Time To Date Again

So these next couple of posts are going to seem counterintuitive to the previous posts that we stated, but bear with me. So an indicator that he has moved on is that he gives himself space and time to be single and enjoy that time for himself. He isn't in a hurry to date another girl because he doesn't want the baggage from your relationship to interfere with his next one. The only way to prevent that from happening would be to just be alone for a certain period of time (and this duration will depend on how long your relationship lasted typically). If you find that he has started to pursue ambitions that he was putting on hold while you were together, then take this as his ticket to freedom. Don't expect him to want to get back together.

13 Secretly Obsessed: He Immediately Rebounds With Another Girl

If you find that he has swiftly started dating or gotten into a relationship with another girl, rather than getting jealous (which is pretty much want he intended to do), just take this as a sign that he is still obsessed with you. This shows a weakness in character on his end because it proves that he is too scared to be alone and must be in a relationship at all times. He has a void that needs to be filled and he just doesn't feel complete unless he has a girlfriend. Again, this is nothing to become jealous over because it means that you have dodged a bullet and no longer have to waste your time with someone who is this emotionally needy. Let him just be someone else's problem now.

12 Moved On: He Eventually Gets A New Girlfriend

After a certain time window has passed following the end of a relationship, then it is time to be open to start dating again. If you guys were in a long term relationship and broke it off, then a longer period time needs to pass before either party can be genuinely happy with a new person. If you see on Facebook that he is in a relationship with another girl after say a few months to a year after your breakup, then he has found love again and has moved on. If it happens too soon after your breakup, than she is a rebound. This sounds like repetition from the previous entry, but this reason is so important that it deserves some reiteration. Timing is everything when it comes to moving on into new relationships.

11 Secretly Obsessed: He Never Gets A New Girlfriend

If you and some dude experienced a breakup a long time ago, you have dated other guys but he has never dated anyone else (and no, friends with benefits don't count), then this might mean that he is still secretly obsessed with you. If you have ever had a guy break your heart but stringing you along and then telling you that "he just isn't ready for a relationship" and "just wants to stay single", then that probably means that some girl crushed him in the past. If you hear that your ex has been philandering around and playing girls that want to date him, then he is just spreading that pain that you (unintentionally) caused him. Don't feel bad for him, feel bad for those poor girls that he keeps hurting.

10 Moved On: He Is Still Cordial With You

The common scenario with breakups is that you and him still both share mutual friends or run in the same social circles. This is what sucks more in the aftermath because you might start to treat your friends as if you have to share custody of divorced children. If he throws all those rules out the window and has no qualms about running into you, then he has moved on. If he is friendly and strikes up conversation as if nothing between you and him ever happened, don't take this as him trying to get back together. This means that he is one of those dudes who has no problem being friends with his ex-girlfriend. Be weary of these types and pursue a friendship with him at your own risk.

9 Secretly Obsessed: He Avoids Any Events With Mutual Friends

So you and him still share the same circles of mutual friends and acquaintances. All of the sudden, they are telling you that he has gone MIA on them and not returning their texts or attempts to get ahold of him. He is going out of his way to avoid you by association or running into you at all costs. He could still secretly be obsessed with you if he not only cuts you off, but cuts off ties with people that he knows you are friends with. Out of all the signs of him still being secretly obsessed with you, this might be the most extreme yet the healthiest. He could just want a fresh slate with new people and surroundings that have nothing to do with you and have complete disassociation with your existence, and that's okay.

8 Moved On: He Tries Out New Hobbies

In addition to making new friends, he tries out that new CrossFit group that he had always been talking about but never had time to try (since he was probably spending it with you). He has moved on if he choose to engage in new activities that you never heard about him being into before. When you try new hobbies, you start to gain new friends and it seems like your social life changes for the better. This is one of the healthiest ways to move on after a breakup. He wants a new life that takes him out of his comfort zone and daily routine. What better way to do that than to take up rock climbing, yoga or just doing more weight lifting here and there? Chances are, he will probably meet his next girlfriend that way.

7 Secretly Obsessed: He Still Lingers Around Places You Frequent

This is the creepiest indicator that he is still secretly obsessed with you. He knows the places that you like to hang out at (bars, clubs, gyms, etc.)… you name it. Sometimes you will see that he is physically there and other times, you will just hear that he was there scoping out the place. He might just be doing this to aggravate you or he is hoping that he will randomly just "run into you" by chance. Rather than worrying yourself too much about this, just let him make himself look like the idiot because this is clearly just a desperate attempt to win back your affection and attention. You either have to feel bad for the guy or just find him pathetic. Either way, maybe its time for you to find some new venues for the sake of avoiding drama.

6 Moved On: You Might Occasionally Get A Like Or Comment On Social Media

So now we are back to talking about social media. Though it might not seem as important, but it is the biggest communication outlet that speaks the most volumes nowadays. Anyways, so some time has gone by since you and your ex broke up. You post something on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram that he knows that you and him both shared in common. All of the sudden, you get a random like or an objective comment in reaction to what you posted. Let's say its a trail that both you and him hiked, a sport that both you and him are into or your favorite restaurant. Maybe that provoked a nice memory that you and him shared. Though he has moved on, he can still appreciate that time that you had. Consider this him offering an olive branch for becoming one of your acquaintances.

5 Secretly Obsessed: He Likes And Comments All Your Posts On Social Media

Leading on from the previous point, if you and him have just broken up and he is still liking and commenting on your posts then he is still trying to get your attention. He is still secretly obsessed if he is still keeping tabs on your social media activity and interacting with you via that outlet any chance he can get. This indicator of him not being over the relationship is pretty mild and harmless. If it bothers you that much, all you have to do is change the settings so that he can't see your posts. If he doesn't have the will to unfollow you, then you might have to take matters into your own hands. The best you can do is just phase him out and eventually he will get the hint.

4 Moved On: You Don't Ever Hear From Them

Immediately following the breakup, if there is just dead radio silence on his end, then that means he is doing the right thing and trying to move on ASAP. It is better to cut off all communication in the aftermath of a breakup to clear the path to move into another direction of the single life. You should be doing the exact same thing. The last thing you should even think about doing after a breakup is contacting your recent ex for any reason whatsoever (unless you lived together and need to pick up your things that are still at his apartment). If he has made absolutely no attempt to contact you (whether it be text, social media or even asking about you through a mutual friend), consider it a clear sign that he wants nothing more to do with you.

3 Secretly Obsessed: They Still Contact You

So you broke up with him and he may or may have not have accepted the fact that it is over to the fullest extent. He may even be in denial that you even broke up with him in the first place. Maybe you were trying to let him down easy but he missed the message that you were breaking up with him. If he still contacts you at the same frequency as he did when you were still dating him, then that could mean that in his mind, the relationship isn't really over and that he is still secretly obsessed with you. In this scenario, you might have to gently and kindly remind him that you two are no longer in a relationship. I know it will suck having to deliver the bad news again, but otherwise he might still continue to blow up your phone.

2 Moved On: He Broke Up With You

This is sign should be the most blatantly clear and obvious, but you would be surprised how most people miss this one. No matter how easy he lets you down or how much he says that he doesn't want to do it, if it is his decision to end things then he is over the relationship. Period. No ands, ifs or buts about this one. The sting is painful and the sense of rejection is overwhelming but this is the reality you need to face if you are ever to move on yourself. Whatever you do, don't let him talk you into being "friends with benefits" after the fact. Have some self-respect and start creating some distance. He broke up with you so now he has to live without you. You need to move on.

1 Secretly Obsessed: You Broke Up With Him

Switching gears here, let's evaluate the circumstance in which you broke up with him. He could still be secretly obsessed if he was happy in the relationship and didn't see it coming. If you broke his heart, whatever you do… don't toy with him after the fact. Don't string him along into believing that there is a chance that you too could end up back together again. If it seemed like he was trying to start fights with you or bailing out on plans, he may have been looking for you to dump him rather than having the gonads to do it himself. If the latter is true, then just disregard this entry. If the former is true, then have some sympathy for the guy if he can't get over it right away. After all, you did break his heart.