16 Signs He Thinks Deep Down It's Time To Break Up (And Isn't Telling You)

We don't often give guys a lot of credit for their minds. A lot of the time it appears as if they're acting and talking without any thought at all. But turns out, there is something happening up there. The cogs are turning. Guys are actually doing a lot more thinking than we originally thought. Sure, they might not over analyze everything to death like we do. They might not get on the group chat and share screenshots. But they do mull things over.

One thing guys definitely think about before taking action is a break up. In fact, they probably spend way more time thinking about breaking up than they need to. There's lots of reasons why guys worry about a break up before actually cutting their girl loose. They might be nervous about your reaction, scared to be alone or afraid to come off like a jerk. So instead of just being honest and cutting things off, they drop some subtle hints. He might be hoping you pick up on these hints and just remove yourself from his life. Is your guy displaying any of these signs? If so, you might need to start packing your bags. It looks like a break up is in your future.

16 He's Flirting With Other Girls And Doesn't Care If You Can See

If you're in a monogomous relationship with someone, one of the obvious no-nos is flirting with other people. He's not single - so he shouldn't be doing that! But if your man is starting to act a little flirtier than normal out in public, you should be on alert. Is he winking at the bartender? Making eyes at the girl across the bar? Schmoozing with a work colleague during the Christmas party? Yeah, you should be worried. If his flirty behavior is crossing the line while you're there, just imagine what he's doing when you're not there. A guy who is being flirty in front of his girlfriend is a guy who doesn't care anymore. In fact, he might want you to call him out on it so you guys can get in a big fight and you can be the one who does the breaking up.

15 All You Get Is One Word Answers To All Of Your Questions

Most guys aren't known for their conversational skills. In fact, the biggest issue in relationships is a lack of communication. But if your guy has completely clammed up lately, you need to take notice. Has he totally stopped having real conversations with you? Are you only getting one word answers to your questions and the bare minimum from him? Has he stopped asking you questions in return? Yeah, that might be because he's stopped caring. He's not putting in effort any more. He's doing the least amount of work possible to be a functioning adult in a conversation. You deserve way better than that. If he's trying to show you he doesn't care anymore because he's over the relationship, count that as a blessing in disguise and kick him to the curb.

14 You Can Do Anything And He Doesn't Seem To Notice

A guy who has one foot out of the door is a guy who no longer cares about you. And if he doesn't care, he isn't paying attention. You might think your boyfriend has gotten really relaxed and laid back if he doesn't seem to care at all when you cancel plans last minute, stay out late with the girls and decide to dance on the bar during happy hour. But be careful. Your guy might not be as easy going as you think. He might just be going. If he's planning to break up with you, he's not going to bother getting all upset about your less than stellar behavior. In fact, he probably didn't even notice that you got home late or that you were missing a shoe.

13 He's Always Too Tired Or Too Busy To Hang Out With You One On One

Excuses, excuses! If your guy has breaking up on his mind, he might start to avoid you. If he can't deal with the confrontation of an actual break up, he might try doing the real shady thing and ghost you. He might just keep telling you he's unavailable and hope that you get the hint. If your guy is pulling this, he's not someone you want to be with anyway. He can't even man up and break up with you properly. A missed date or two due to late nights at work or his mom coming over at the last minute is no big deal. But if he's bailing on every date and his excuses are getting real flimsy - like having to stay home to feed his cat - you should be on alert. It sounds like you've got a ghost on your hands.

12 Every Little Conversation Turns Into A Huge Argument

The opposite method to ghosting: picking fights. Some guys don't want to totally disappear on their girls. So instead, they pick fights. Now sometimes, this isn't intentional. They're not planning to argue with you. But because tensions are so high and they're wanting to break up anyway, everything turns into a fight. Putting his dress shirt in the dryer by accident and it shrunk? He's furious. Forgot to buy a new jug of milk for his morning cereal? He's enraged. Even the simplest conversations, like asking about his day, end in big screaming matches. Obviously all of this fighting and yelling isn't good for either of you. Sounds like that break up couldn't come soon enough. If he's waiting for you to pull the plug, save yourself some tears and screams and just do it.

11 When He Does Talk To You, He's Always Talking About Change

This is a really subtle sign that a guy might be thinking about breaking up with you. He's not ghosting you and he's not picking fights. But he is trying to give you a hint. He's doing it by talking about change. For example, when you ask how his day at work went, he might tell you he's actually thinking of leaving his job and starting somewhere else where he'll have to work a lot of overtime. Or he might bring up the fact that he wants to go back to school at a college out of state. Or he'll casually mention that he's always wanted to do a really long back-packing trip around Europe all by himself. Notice a theme? He's talking about major life changes and you're not a part of them.

10 The PDA Is MIA

When you two first started going out, were you all over each other? Holding hands in the car, sneaking kisses at the movies, touching each other under the table at dinner and unable to keep your hands to yourself? It's normal that you might not be as touchy feely once you've been dating for a long time. But if you went from a normal level of PDA to absolutely nothing all of a sudden, it may be a sign that your guy is thinking of ending things. If he's on his way out of the relationship, he's pulling back. It's only natural that he would be less affectionate and not want to be as physical with you. If he has stopped holding your hand, giving you kisses and putting his arm around you, you need to take a step back and figure out what's happening.

9 He Has Stopped Putting Any Effort In

We all know the story about the couple who got together and immediately stopped putting in effort. It was all sweatpants and take out. For most, a night of take out, Netflix and sweatpants is actually pretty romantic. But some guys take it even farther. They start putting in absolutely no effort to the relationship. Maybe you two trade off planning date nights every week. For his turn? He completely "forgets" to plan the date. He shrugs and reheats some leftovers for the two of you to enjoy while he plays video games. He's totally stopped trying. He doesn't pick up after himself around the house. He doesn't try and have conversations with you. He doesn't remember anything important you've told him. Essentially, he's just waiting for you to get fed up with his act and break up with him.

8 Talking About The Future Freaks Him Out So Much

We all know the stereotype that guys are afraid of commitment. It's common knowledge that you can't start talking about engagement rings, wedding plans or baby names with a guy you're not super serious and in a longterm relationship with. Even then, that guy is probably sweating during the conversation. But if even the smallest talk about the future freaks your guy out, you might have a problem on your hand. If you bring up your sister's wedding this summer and he immediately shuts down and refuses to talk about, that's not good. If you ask about booking flights home for Easter weekend and he starts yelling about maybe having to work that weekend, that's also not very good. The future can be scary but things happening in the near future shouldn't be so freaky, unless he's not planning a near future with you.

7 You Never Get A Text Back

Now this is the next level of ghosting. This is a guy who doesn't even bother to make up excuses to not hang out with you. He's just going radio silent. When you text him in the morning, he'll wait hours to reply to you. He might not reply at all and just pretend he didn't get it. If he still has to see you in person, he'll claim that he lost his phone or it died on him when you ask what's up with his texts. The truth is he just doesn't want to be in touch with you. He's distancing himself and slowly preparing for the break up. You probably feel like you're back in your early dating days when you would sit by your phone and wait for a text. You're better than that.

6 Everything Is A "Maybe"

If a guy is ready to break up, it means he doesn't want to commit. Or at least, he doesn't want to commit to you. So if he's not committed to the relationship, you'll probably notice a lot of non-committal language. The biggest sign is the word "maybe." "Maybe" is the polite way of saying no. This guy isn't ready to break your heart just yet so he's buying time by filling your ears with lots of maybe. You suggest going to that cool date night at your local aquarium next month. He says, "Oh, that sounds cool. Yeah, maybe we can do that. Definitely something to think about." You suggest dinner with your work friends next week. "Maybe. We'll see." Everything is a maybe because he doesn't want to say yes bu he's not ready to say no.

5 He Is Always On Edge And You Have To Walk On Eggshells Around Him

If your guy is planning a break up, he's likely going to be tense. Any of your flaws are going to seem a lot worse to him. And every day he doesn't break up with you and has to keep being in a relationship he doesn't want to be in, is another day for him to get more stressed. So all of that stress means that your guy is always on edge. He's probably got a permanently furrowed brow. Every little thing sets him off. He's just no fun to be around anymore. And you seem to always be the cause of his stress. Of course, you have no clue what's going on in his head. All you know is that you have to walk on eggshells whenever you're around him so he doesn't lose his cool.

4 His Friends Have Started Icing You Out

So while guys might not be as into the group chat as we are and they might not send as many screenshots, they still talk to their friends. If he's planning a break up, he's probably talked to his guys about it. He might not have gotten into the details but odds are his closest buds will know about the break up before you do. And if they know you two are nearing your end, they may start to ice you out. If you normally get along really well with his friends but all of a sudden, they freeze up around you, that's not good. If they can't stand being alone with you and are acting all awkward, it might be because they know something you don't. Guys aren't great at keeping secrets so if his friends are acting weird around you, something is probably up.

3 He Keeps Pointing Out How You Two Are Different Even Though Nothing Has Changed

This is another tactic guys use when they want to break up, but they want you to be the one who does the actual breaking up. They'll try to convince you that your relationship is doomed. Even though absolutely nothing has changed, they'll keep trying to show you the negatives so you want to move on. It goes a little something like this: "Oh did you buy chocolate ice cream? I actually wanted vanilla. I don't even like chocolate. Guess we just like different things. Just another example of how different we are, I guess." Differences that he used to think made you two work, like him being impulsive and you being organized, suddenly are cause for breaking up. Only, he wants you to come to that realization, so he's making it obvious for you.

2 You Can't Remember The Last Time You Heard A Compliment

When a guy is planning to break up with you, he probably isn't thinking about all of your amazing qualities. I mean, how could he break up with you if he was thinking about how gorgeous your eyes are, what a good cook you are and how funny you are? He just couldn't. So he's not thinking about how awesome you are. Which means he's also not telling you how awesome you are. If your guy used to compliment you every time you put on a new outfit or tell you how great you are at your job, but all of a sudden that's stopped - look out. Either your guy is planning a break up or he's suddenly become a jerk and doesn't know how to support you anymore. Both guys suck.

1 You Feel Awful Around Him And Your Woman's Intuition Is Going Off

Listen, you know whether or not your guy is planning to break up with you. You just know. Most break ups are not blindsides. There are always signs. Women always see these things coming. And that's because we have our women's intuition. Take a page out of Kimmy Schmidt's book and listen to your gut. Forget about how cute he looks in his new jeans and focus on how you feel when you're with him. Are you feeling tense, nervous, angry, sad and just plain awful? That's not good. Either he is planning a break up and that's why you feel that way. Or he's not, but you should break up with him anyway because why do you want to feel like that with your partner? You deserve better, honey!