15 Things To Never Do If You Really Like Him

It's not every day that you meet somebody you really connect with. When you do start dating a person you actually like (not the attention they give you, nor the idea of being with them, but just them), then you definitely don't want to mess it up by making silly mistakes! There are a number of things you can do that are likely to doom the relationship, and end up scaring him (or yourself!) away. They might not seem like a big deal, but over time, they can end up transforming into massive issues that destroy what could have been a strong and healthy relationship. You might think some of the following are ways to tie down a man, but if you're really feeling the guy you're seeing, then you should avoid them at all costs. Here are 15 things to not do if you genuinely like him, and want him to stick around!

15 Be Stubborn

We all have a little stubbornness in us, but you really don't want to feed that side of yourself when it comes to your relationship with somebody you really like. One of the quickest ways to turn the other person off and ruin the relationship is to never own your mistakes, say you're sorry and admit you were wrong. It's good to be proud, but we all eff up from time to time, and the best thing you can do is own it! Being overly stubborn is only going to remind him that you'd be difficult to live with. If you want the relationship to last, you also don't want to be too closed-minded. Be open to new experiences with him (as in fun date ideas, not bedroom activities that make you uncomfortable!), and try new things together. You never know when true love could blossom, so try and embrace every opportunity you have together.

14 Ignore His Goals And Expectations

If you want to get serious with somebody, it's best to acknowledge the important things up front. You don't want to jump to conclusions, but at the same time, there isn't any point in settling down with somebody who has totally different goals and expectations to you if neither of you are willing to compromise. If you can't wait to buy a house in the suburbs and have three or four kids, but he's interested in climbing the corporate ladder and travelling all over the country, you have to think about how it's going to work. You might not want to discuss this with him when you've been dating for only a month, but at least do some thinking for yourself. If it's obvious that you're two different people who just don't fit, acknowledge that before you give him your heart. Don't ignore important incompatibilities, because it will only hurt more when they come back to bite you.

13 Betray Him

Really, you should try hard not to betray anyone! But when you have a relationship that you care about deeply, you want to be extra careful that you don't mess it up with mistakes that all people can make. Respecting your significant other is the most important aspect to building a strong foundation together, and yet so many people forget all about it! Work on the romance and intimacy side, but also remember the basics of friendship and decency. Don't say mean things about him behind his back, even if you're having a deep and meaningful with the squad. Defend him in public, and don't embarrass him or put him down in front of his friends. Make time for him and listen to him vent when he needs to. Just really apply all the rules of good friendship, because when things get rocky, you want to have more behind you than just steaminess and attraction!

12 Act Paranoid

Let's get one thing straight: if he's giving you a reason to feel suspicious, do some thinking before you get serious with him. You have to think objectively for this one, and maybe get some advice from a friend who tells it like it is. If he's done nothing to make you feel suspicious and your own insecurities are getting the better of you, put a stop to them immediately! It doesn't come from a nasty place, but acting paranoid sends a person the signal that they're untrustworthy, and really isn't fair if they actually can be trusted. Trust is another important element to a successful relationship, so if you can't get that going, a future with each other might not be in the cards. Acting paranoid can include things that seem low-key to you, like double-checking his Facebook, grazing at his phone over his shoulder, and getting jealous when he goes out.

11 Be Lazy

Relationships take work to maintain (who knew?!), so something like laziness can actually bring you and bae undone, even if it doesn't seem like a big deal. Things like not making the effort to see him because you can't be bothered getting off the couch and arriving late to your dates because you forget about them come across badly, and might just piss him off enough to give you the flick. It'd be a real shame to lose something great just because you were careless, so don't let it get in the way (even though we totally get that a warm bed on a Sunday morning is much better than putting on makeup for brunch!). Being lazy can also mean not being bothered to take care of yourself and look nice, which can turn him off too. Not because looks are hugely important, but because good hygiene and clean clothes reflect your own self-worth.

10 Rush Things

We know we said that you should acknowledge any major differences between you early on, but at the same time, don't rush the relationship along as quickly as you can. As long as you can't see any huge issues (like his plans to move to Peru next year), then let things progress between you naturally. If you like someone, it's tempting to ask where you're going, what you are, how he feels, etc, but there will be time for conversations like that in due course. Trying to have that conversation prematurely can scare him off, and make you seem very highly strung. It's better to give him his own space and not suffocate him with a constant stream of texts, retweets, phone calls, and general showing up at his doorstep. There will come a time when you want to be around each other a lot, so don't force it before it's ready!

9 Play Too Hard To Get

You don't want to smother him, and you also don't want to play too hard to get. Both extremes can end up having a negative effect on the relationship, and can screw things up royally for you. It's understandable that you don't want to be available every minute of the day, and you don't want to drop everything to please him, but being too unavailable can get annoying. Those sorts of games can also stop being enticing and become plain rude, like when you don't reply to his texts for days, don't answer his calls, blow him off, and ignore him when you're together. At the end of the day, it's important to maintain that level of respect between you, so just treat him like you would another person you care about. Don't wait with your phone in your hand, but y'know, reply when you see his message. Strike a happy balance!

8 Concentrate On His Flaws

Everybody has their own flaws, and if you looked for it, you could find something to turn you off in every guy on the planet. Yes, that includes George Clooney! When you really like somebody, don't allow yourself to dwell on the negative sides of them and eventually talk yourself out of liking them. That's one surefire way to stay lonely forever! Of course, you shouldn't have to force the attraction if it's not there, or settle with someone you don't like just because you want to be mature and overlook their bad qualities. All we're saying is don't concentrate on his flaws to the point where it changes your mind about him, and even makes him feel bad. If there's something about him that really bothers you, and it's something that could reasonably be changed, you might like to find a time to bring it up rather than dumping him over it.

7 Lose Your Own Beliefs

You want to make sure that you don't do things to disappoint yourself when you're dating somebody you really like. No matter how much you like someone, you should never betray your own beliefs, values, and goals for their sake. It's fine if they teach you things and help you to see the world in a different way-it's totally possible to form a different opinion after you've spent a lot of time with someone. But don't change those things about yourself especially for them. Don't neglect your career if it was important to you before you met him, or if it would be important to you if he woke up tomorrow and left. The days of having another person to complete you are gone; you're your own person, and your partner just enhances your life and complements you. Don't let them dissolve the elements that make you who you are!

6 Have Him Solve All Of Your Insecurities

In the same way, try not to let the person you like be a solution to all of your insecurities. If you've suffered from a low self-esteem in the past, it's easy and tempting to feel better as soon as he calls you pretty. The problem with that is it's going to leave you right back where you started if things don't work out between ya'll! If you weren't feeling confident before you met him, find ways to enhance your confidence that don't include him. You can accept compliments from him and let them feel good (because they do!), but don't let that be all you have; don't tie your own value to him. If something goes wrong between you, you'll be absolutely devastated and broken because you've lost your love, and you've lost your self-worth. Not only that, but it's easy to tell when a person needs somebody else to validate their existence, and it's not the best look.

5 Forget To Appreciate Him

Finding and being with somebody you have genuine feelings for is a beautiful thing, and as you can see, kind of tricky business! Between making sure you're doing all the right things and avoiding mistakes, you might accidentally forget to appreciate what you have with your partner, and that's one of the biggest mistakes of all! We all want to be appreciated, and if your SO wasn't appreciating you, we'd tell you to do something about it quick smart. So of course, it works both ways. Take the time to tell him that you appreciate having him there. Don't take him for granted by assuming that he's always going to be there or treating him like he doesn't matter. If he has any self-worth of his own, he won't put up with that sort of behavior for long. The essence of this one is easy-if you really like him, just let him know!

4 Hold His Past Against Him

We all make mistakes, and nobody likes having those mistakes thrown in their face. New relationships are all about new beginnings, learning from past errors and moving on, but if you won't let him do that, it's likely that he'll want to put himself in an environment where he can. Depending on the situation, everybody deserves a second chance if they're remorseful, and if they're willing to change. So if he's showing that he's moved on from the mistakes of his past, holding it against him is unfair and will probably make him grow to resent you. You don't want that, especially if you genuinely like him! If you can't let go of something that he did way back when, you have to try and find a way to deal with it without dragging him down every chance you get, or you have to have another think about whether this is somebody you can be serious with.

3 Keep Secrets From Him

Obviously, you don't have to tell him every little aspect of your life. With irrelevant secrets, like the fact that you collect stamps or love peanut butter in your salad, it's probably not a huge deal if you don't tell him. There are things you're allowed to keep to yourself! But where it concerns him, don't keep things bottled up just to maintain the peace. If something is bothering you about him, and it's not something you can let go of, it's best to find a calm way to bring it up. As the saying goes, rip the Band-Aid off quickly, so you can move on with your life. If you do keep things concealed, they'll eat away at you, and might even cause you to resent him over time. Then you might find yourself ending the relationship over something that could have been contained in a single conversation. So loosen those lips!

2 Let Fear Stop You

If anybody tells you that new relationships aren't scary, they're lying. In all honesty, they're freaking terrifying! Especially if you're new to the whole dating thing, or if you're used to being by yourself, the thought of letting someone in can stir up butterflies in your stomach like nothing else. But just because something is scary, doesn't mean that you should run away from it. The truth is that some of the best things in this world reside just on the other side of fear, and if you like someone, something amazing could be in reach. You probably will feel nauseous as you're walking to the date. And you might lose your appetite every time his name flashes on your phone. But that stuff is kind of exciting in its own way, and what's more, it goes away as you grow closer. Don't let fear get in the way of a relationship with somebody important!

1 Hide Your True Self

This is our top mistake to avoid making, purely because no good can come of it, and because people do it all the time. We've all done it in the past! Hiding who you really are to make somebody like you is the oldest trick in the book, and also the stupidest. Do we even need to explain why this is a no-go? When you pretend to be someone you're not to make someone fall in love with you, they're not actually falling in love with you. They're falling in love with the person you're portraying. Eventually, you'll break and 'fess up, and they'll feel rightly cheated. Just remember that even if you really like them, it's not just them you want. You want their unconditional love, affection and acceptance of who you are. If they can't accept you, then you need to look elsewhere, no matter how much you like them.